Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Things I will never use again... Numer One: The Dewey Decimal System.


1. The Dewey Decimal System.

Each morning when we arrived at school, if my memory serves me correctly, we faced our nap mats toward the birthplace of Mr. Dewey and proceded with meditative chants honoring him. Our librarian insisted we commonly refer to the Dewey System as the greatest achievement in the history of mankind, and that she should bear his children if she were lucky enough.

I have gathered an official statement from Dr. Jason Hughes, previously of El Paso, TX, now living in Iowa City, IA via a shortcut from Las Crusas, NM but soon headed to Mason City- "Screw Dewey." Thank you Dr. Hughes.
I guess maybe there was a need for Mr. Dewey's system at some point in our previously archaic lives, but I am confident I can go the rest of my life without using it.

2. The Pythagorean Theorem. Ok, a lot more useful than the Dewey Decimal System, but unless Mercury Volatile Brownell needs help with her homework, I think I can flush this one.

3. My Sony Walkman CD player. I still buy CD's, but they immediately get loaded on my computer, Ripped to MP3's and iTunes and are filed away in the closet.

Things I will never use again Honorable Mention:
4. The Golden Rule
5. Paper Books


7 comments:

Anonymous said...

So you still use the Clapper and the Pocket Fisherman. Godd to know.

Anonymous said...

Things I don't use: spellcheck

Cory said...

I like how no longer using "The Golden Rule" is so self-evident it doesn't even require an explanation, but the Dewey Decimal System does.

My top 3 are:

3. Anything learned in Calculus II
2. Zip Disks
1. Brad Alan Traub's dorm fridge

Cory said...

I just saw Paper Books. PAPER BOOKS?! Are you kidding? How the heck are you supposed to read all those pulpy fantasy novels, on a computer screen?! Gack!

Also, I have all the rest of those Drow books in the series (with the wizard drow guy), there's like 6 more of them. I read them in Thailand and brought them back with me. They're pretty good, you can have them if you want.

Travis said...

"Brad Alan Traub's dorm fridge" - hahaha. That made me laugh hard.

Yeah, I really didn't think through the paper book comment. I should have stated paper reference books. I loathe looking up medical stuff in books. I like it all on the computer.

I could never give up the pulpy fantasy novels. Just finished another one.

brando said...

The last drizt book I read was about a thousand orcs. Lemme read em.

Yeah, on the Golden Rule tip, why'd you say that you were no longer going to use it? :) That would sort require it to be used at some point.

Zip Disks. I hate to admit that I do my backups on Zip Disks. I have the drive, so I'm using it darnit.

Cory said...

I've got plenty more books for you Brando. "Tales of the Old World Omnibus." over 1000+ pages full of Warhammer Fantasy short stories about Dwarves, Skaven, Warpstone, Chaos, Brettonians, and Witch Hunters (lots of witch hunters). I just finished it, you'll love it.